lost

Its gonna end....hold it...ren......I dont know how much longer i can take it....I dont want to suffer....it hurts....mentally killing me inside....slowly showing on the physicals.....I dont know what am i becoming.....Please...juz let me be in peace....I wan to master my lk....bonds friendships how true and how far is it extent?....During your times of troubles you will be able to see who is ur true friend and who is the devil....I see it all already....but why do i still believe?....Stress is the number 1 silent killer....Im lost....Who can show me the path?I need someone...I cant stand this loneliness anymore...I need someone to support me..for now....I dont know if i even zhi can in my sleep...i have enough and nice sleep recently...but...i always wake up wif full of tears...and even some scars or red at my hand or leg....did i do this to myself?I dont know....I scare Im developing another personality or slowly going insane....Help me...anyone...

The ending

A lot have happen over the past few weeks and days...All this events and happening have keep my heart on a rocky sea full of uncertainties...Appears what i treasure most are slowly drifting away distant itself...I reach out to try to catch them swimming my hardest in this sea...but the current kept pushing me back..and i got further...Then i start to doubt myself...is everything that we've been through are just illusions?I do not know....but slowly...certainly..I'm reaching my limits...I do not know how much longer can I stand...but i will continue to drill on this path....But i know the end is near...it wont be far i must stay strong...till the end...please...let me hold on till everything is over...please tell me everything is real and not a illusion...i don't want to find out everything i hold treasure and important to me for so long are all just a illusion....show me the light....

sleepless night@@

i lie on the bed for almost 4 hours ++ and i still cant fall asleep~~god why cant you just let me sleep plss :( and now its 2 30 am d== around 5 hours n half i shall take spm >< may the luck be wif me now~try to slp again orelse i be lying on bed unable to sleep again @@

Save you from anything

I know one power is limited but with what i can do i will aim for the top!
I know i can't save everyone but I must at least save those I hold dear to me! 

for this I push on towards my goals and my selfish desires to attain this future
Save you from anything!

Lonely night

A rainy night such as the one tonight..combine with some events...I really cant help myself but let tears roll down my face...Is not because I realise how close SPM is...but how close is it to be seperated from the people that we take for granted everyday...just a short period of time left and we can't be in that classroom doing stupid stuff or even sitting there listening to a boring teacher teach~and saturday a graduation event~reality comes and slap me in the face...I thought I had already resolve what is to come...but it appears I am still human it still pains me when you see everything reality really isn't fair..but we can only deal with it...I really feel like finding someone and hug them real tightly and say how much i love them...there is so many troubles to deal with recently...but i could not express it out...taking everything out on myself...I really ain't a good leader...This darkness...This coldness...This sadness...This loneliness...Is gonna be a long night of self reflecting...onwards to the uncertain waves in the future as i silently watch the night rain with tears...

How insignificant is one's power...

Today was a nice day something worth to keep in memories again >< crazy ppl can frm paradigm mall shopping till time square wow...wat a change xD...took sometime to chose someone present...but i hope she like it xD......haiz...then later on...on a train felt so useless....I cant believe we dint even notice it...so useless...I really feel Im a failure for a man...how can i let tat happen to ppl tat are close to me?then it is revealed thr are more tat are close to me that face the same thing...i feel ashamed not noticing it not knowing it....haiz....is it why they all leave me?cause im useless?failure as a man and a mummy....Knowing the world it is now like tat...yet i dint expect it to happen to people close to me...haiz...I really have to be more observant...feel sorry for my girls......I only wish to have the power to protect....the ppl close to me...Time draws near to the end....I wonder if i will still be me when i rush on my own path tat im ready to set out...i hope i could still have all this wonder full friends...i wan to protect this bonds...for the road ahead i walk wont be an easy one to attain true freedom...I will walk the path of those success full people's they inspire me....i hope this path wont cut my bonds wif all my current friends...school is ending soon...so far yet so near...This is wat it meant by growing up isn't it??sometime i wish i could think more easier...i feel my mindset and thinking are so far from the peoples around me now...how very fragile i am... :(...I close my eyes as i wish for it to end a happy end...

wait??for miracle?!muri==

Owh so late d 1 more hour to pass this day what am i still waiting for??miracle i guess??just ask her straight??whether she remembers??tried and kenna ignore sad life~ >< wonder why I still remember them all this special day's...maybe cause i cant let go of the past??na juz a lesson from the past i guess and as a memento....well i guess only time can heal...juz like my star sign suggest...gemini..6-8 months >< despite the fact we do not look serious and do not care we are quite an loyally dumb dogs i guess?haha xD.